Couples and Marriage Counseling

Has your relationship with your partner become a source of pain and frustration rather than joy and happiness? Do you find yourself repeating the same arguments? Have you become strangers to each other, settling for a dull and listless relationship? Or are you facing a crisis that is stretching your relationship to the breaking point?

Most couples need help at one time or another. Problems with your partner or spouse can be one of the most painful and disruptive things to deal with in life. Common issues couples argue about include:

Money and finances
Sex
Household chores
Parenting styles
In-laws and family
Friends and social life
Infidelity and mistrust

You might be feeling misunderstood, unappreciated, lonely, angry, resentful, hurt, or just plain exhausted from dealing with conflict. Maybe you long for more connection and intimacy, or feel confused about where the relationship is headed.

Couples and marriage counseling can help you and your partner:

Stop the cycle of arguing
Communicate effectively
Be able to resolve conflicts on your own
Understand each other better
Gain clarity about the relationship
Deepen your connection and intimacy
Bring joy back into the relationship

In my four-part method for couples counseling, I help you and your partner:

1. Address any immediate crises and establish emotional safety and the groundwork to move forward.

Many couples wait until they are in a severe crisis before they seek help. Often by this time, this means some very destructive patterns have taken hold. I will help you put a stop to these and create a safe way to move forward.

2. Learn new communication and problem-solving tools.

Many people do not learn effective relationship skills growing up. In my approach to couples and marriage counseling, I can help you develop new skills that will improve your relationship and help you resolve conflicts with less pain and drama. An important part of this is learning to express yourself in an effective way that does not leave your partner feeling blamed, criticized or humiliated.

3. Resolve underlying issues and patterns that keep you in a state of chronic dissatisfaction.

It’s unavoidable that you and your partner will each bring your past issues into your present relationship. A key part of couples and marriage counseling is identifying the patterns where you are stuck and what is behind these patterns. Then we work to release the burdens you carry and transform negative beliefs and behaviors into positive ones. This is the most direct way to create lasting change.

4. Support and build on the positive aspects of your relationship.

Research shows the most important factor in nearly all healthy marriages and sexual relationships is a strong friendship. I will help you identify your relationship strengths and build upon these. You can recapture the fondness and closeness you once shared and gain an even deeper connection with each other.

I understand that it can be difficult to open up your most intimate issues with a stranger. In my approach to couples and marriage counseling, I am very sensitive to this and provide you and your partner a safe environment and the latitude to set the pace and to determine what you are and are not willing to discuss.

Contact me today at (503) 347-4863 or email me to schedule a counseling session or to set up a FREE phone consultation.

Office located in Portland, Oregon. Serving the Portland metro area, including Beaverton, Hillsboro, Lake Oswego, Tigard, West Linn, Milwaukie, Clackamas, Oregon City, Tualatin, Gresham, and Vancouver, WA.